When you're in love...

O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirst for more. I am painfully conscious of my need for further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, so that I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, "Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away." Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long.--AW Tozer, The Pursuit of God

I have never been one for gushy, sappy, romantic stuff. I never really played into my girl friends fantasies about a knight in shining armor or happily ever after. I had seen first hand what people can do to each other. Some have called me cynical, others a realist. I don't know what I am. I just really don't get terribly surprised when someones actions disappoint me. Now don't get me wrong. I want to find that love of a lifetime. Someone with whom to share this journey. But I think bells, whistles, and fireworks are just a tad bit unrealistic.

That being said...I have fallen head over heals in love with someone. I have never felt so full of life. He brings me flowers, writes me songs and love letters, protects me from meanies, lifts me up, lets me cry, holds my hand, and most of all accepts me for all that I am (and am not). I spent the better part of my life trying to get my worth from people around me (not a good idea, people will disappoint you and misuse this power). I no longer need others approval. I only need to be accepted and love by my one and only!!!

Who is this amazingly perfect someone? MY JESUS!!!! When I think about how much He loves me (even though He knows my heart, thoughts, everything) I am mystified. I mean He loves me so much that he gave up his place in heaven to come here. He came to a place where he knew he would be chastised, beaten, and killed. All because He love ME! In the book The Shack it says, "He would have done it even if it was just for me, but it wasn't." Like how crazy is that? These are the same hands that created the universe, put life into motion, carved the earth, and made me. Do I even realize what a big deal that is? Can I even comprehend that I have the greatest lover of all times?

All I do know is that He is on my mind constantly. I can't get enough! I want to read His Word, sing His praise, glorify His Name 24/7!!!

I never thought I could ever feel this way about anyone or anything. I'm so glad I do and hope I always will. I pray for diligence.